Single Bells, Single Bells, Single all the way….
Are you dreading Christmas?
The festive season stirs up all kinds of emotions, especially if you’re single, from bah humbug to abject misery. It is a holiday that perpetuates myths about family togetherness at a time when togetherness is probably not really an option. We have grown up with the romantic notion that Christmas is time to forge heart-warming memories and indulge in Yuletide festivities and kiss under the mistletoe.
But Christmas Time Enemy Number 1 is loneliness. 2020 has been a pretty lonely year and 2021 is heading that way too. The choices seem bleak: put on the TV and watch lots of couples getting festive or face nosy family members asking why you haven’t found anyone yet. And a new round of Covid misery isn’t helping the cause either. Here’s some tips on surviving the rest of 2021.
Don’t wallow. Wallowing is a downward spiral to misery. It’s a difficult nut to crack, especially as there’s not much to get excited about at the moment, but visualise a nutcracker, a big one, and get cracking. Let’s face it, have you ever walked into a party and thought ‘I’ll talk to that miserable person nursing a 7up in the corner?’ Answer: never.
Start small if you like but try to DO something. Go to parties, see old friends, visit Christmas markets, cook something, and invite people over for dinner or if you feel like pushing the boat out, why not volunteer for a charity, such as Crisis, over Christmas? It didn’t go quite the way he thought when Hugh Grant lied his way into a SPAT meeting in About a Boy, but it panned out in the end. Mistletoe is the festive season icebreaker of choice!
And if you are still feeling miserable, spare a thought for the couples. No agonising over presents. No stress over whose house to eat Christmas dinner at. Nearly 2 million people consider getting divorced over the period. The third Monday in January is called Black Monday by lawyers because it’s the busiest divorce time of the year. 70% of divorces are initiated during this week - Christmas arguments festering, credit card bills coming in, freezing weather, no sunlight, pasty faces, back to work in the dark, a never-ending January looming until you get paid - hardly surprising really. It’s time we invented a word in English for Schadenfreude, German for ‘happiness at other people’s misery’.
And if you can’t face Christmas at home, there’s always the option jumping on a plane for a winter break. There’s something especially uplifting about a nice tan in January.
But if you want something to look forward to for the New Year, why not give 2022 the best chance for love and make Resolution number 1 to enlist a professional matchmaker to do some of the spade work finding you a perfect partner?