Finding Love Again

Wherever we turn the media throws love stories at us. We see couples with shiny teeth, naked couples, disabled couples, unlikely couples, bearded couples, LGBTQIA2+ couples - couples of every sex, creed, and colour.

If you have seen these couples and are reading this feeling a little lonely and thinking about love, it may be time to dip into dating again. You might be happy - you’ve got a nice home, a dog, a family, a career or whatever else fulfils you on a day-to-day basis - but you feel as though something is missing and you know in your soul that you’d like someone to share it with.

It might have been a while since you have dipped your toe into the dating scene. You may be a little daunted at the prospect. Dating is fluid and fast moving where the rules seem to change with the seasons. So, what do you need to bring to the party to make one half of a fabulous future couple?

The basics of successful dating have not really changed much. First off, search smart. This is mainly mindset. Keep in shape, go out, go to an art exhibition, a wine tasting event or a member’s club on your own and talk to people. Then, if you’re OK with online, don’t photoshop your photos, be your natural self and write the truth. If online is a no no (which is what we recommend), then socialise with your single friends, go to networking events.

To cut through the red tape of stress and wasted time, join a professional matchmaking agency and have a skilled matchmaker take you through the process of finding you the right partner. Manage your expectations, be patient, keep an open mind, stay positive and you’re on the road to fulfilment.

And if you’re nervous, put on a smile. Look around, no negative small talk, and don’t forget to breathe!

You’ve met someone and it’s going well. It never hurts to plan the date - keeping an element of control and doing something you both like - champagne on the London Eye, a country walk and pub lunch, tandem bike, perhaps even a helicopter ride over London - finding common interests never hurts but it’s fine not to have them too. It’s nice to introduce your new partner to new things and vice versa. Variety is the spice of life!

If you’re out there for a long-term partnership remember to keep one eye open for the red flags - e.g. you feel there are secrets on the other side, non-committal behaviour, the other going frequently off the radar or feeling an imbalance of power - trust your instincts - an early spot will save you a lot of time and potential heartbreak. And it’s easy to say but sometimes difficult to do, try to avoid those common mistakes like neediness, game playing, checking your phone constantly, talking about exes, or even being late.

If you manage your expectations and go into the fray with a view to the outcome, not the process, the chances are it will work out. So, enjoy, don’t worry, and have fun!