If your gift to yourself this Valentine’s Day is to get serious about your dating life, then one of the easiest steps to take is sorting out your dating profile.  Whether you’re with a matchmaker, on a dating site, or occasionally flirt with an app or two, there are common mistakes that many, many people make. This month we have a list to keep you on your dating tippy toes.  If you spot even the smallest improvement you could make, then do it. Little changes can have huge results.

 

Photos

How many of you have been on a date with someone who looked nothing like their profile image? We’ve heard all kinds of epic tales, including a man who merged a picture of himself with Sean Connery.  He was worried about being recognised by friends but didn’t want the profile picture to look too different from himself.  Needless to say, he looked nothing like Mr Connery.

Please, when it comes to your photos, it’s a very simple rule; keep them no more than a couple of years old, no celebrity merging, no reality-defying angles.

Also, profiles that have multiple images, in different settings and which demonstrate varied aspects of your personality are always a winner.  If they’re not all selfies, then even better.

 

Invest

There’s an old saying that we’d like to gently remind you of here at Berkeley International, and that’s ‘If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys’. When things aren’t going so well with dating, you must look at the company you’re keeping and the environment that’s encouraging it.  If you’re paying £4 a year for a service, the calibre of potential partners will likely reflect it.

Think about where you have your hair done, where you do your nails, clean your car or the restaurants you choose to eat for dinner.  If you’re dating life matters as much as all of those, then invest in it just as much.

 

Write outside of the box
Yes, we’re all looking for a good time, to have fun, a laugh, to see where things go but what is this really telling someone about yourself, what does it really mean?  Common phrases or sentiments that are seen from profile to endless profile are unhelpful in asserting your uniqueness and genuine desires in a relationship.

Rather than list the things you’d be crazy to not want, spend extra time on what’s most important or special to you.  As an example, if you are an avid explorer-adventurer, have scaled Everest and partake in multiple expeditions each year, don’t simply write ‘sporty, love to travel.’ You’re missing a prime opportunity to not only express who you really are but also to connect with someone genuinely compatible.

 

Be available, not stuck

Dating can take up a lot of time and sometimes feels like an extra day job.  If you’re not lucky enough to have a matchmaker to help you separate the wheat from the chaff, then there are some definite rules you should aim to stick with as much as possible.

To help stop becoming overwhelmed, decide what time of day you’re going to log into accounts, exactly how much time you’ll spend scrolling and what days you’ll take a break from it all.

Don’t be too rigid with yourself or too flexible for strangers. Be active on the dating scene, not obsessive.

 

Ask questions
This is really important to us at Berkeley International but overlooked by a lot of people in the dating world.  When we work with clients we like to know what specific questions they want us to ask prospective dates.  Being curious and thinking outside of yourself for a while makes it clear that you’re truly interested in a partnership, in the deepest sense of the word.

Try to not stick with the standard ‘What sort of food do you like? Have you got any hobbies?’ script. Attempt a couple of questions that would really impact a relationship, such as ‘Where do you see yourself in five years?’ or, ‘What’s the best example of a happy, healthy relationship that you know?’

For more information about our discrete matchmaking services why not fill out our quick online enquiry form.