It’s Romance Awareness Month this August, which on the one-hand sounds beautifully exciting and on the other, like a campaign for some mildly awkward syndrome. The biggest question from those in relationships is probably ‘what does one do during romance awareness month?’ Is it a call to be more astute in spotting our partner’s efforts?  Or, is it a time for us to be kinder to people in general? The uncertainty most likely resides in the use of the noun awareness, because in fact romance is a doing word and is one hundred per cent about action.

Think outside the box

There are many acts and material objects that will forever be inextricably linked to the idea of romance.  We’re talking candles, chocolates, flowers, surprise dinners and maybe even surprise gifts.  All of these displays can help to set the scene of our romantic lives but honestly, once we get to a certain stage it’s the smaller, more subtle acts that can really keep a relationships thriving.

The menial tasks, mostly unacknowledged because they’re expected, can often demonstrate the most sincere romance and tell you lot about the person you’re with.  These tasks show consistent consideration and attentiveness that is often disregarded as routine.  Running a bath, taking the bins out, pumping petrol for your partner, doing the washing up so they can relax, these are all gifts that we should never take for granted.  Whilst on their own they appear to be the polar opposite of romantic, the fundamental idea of romance is to show how much someone is loved and appreciated.  Try to value the gift and receipt of such offerings.

Create your own holidays

Days dedicated to all things love related do crop up on us many times throughout the year.  The most obvious is St Valentine’s Day and you probably also have an anniversary or two to celebrate.  Yes, these are all great cues to appreciate the relationships we have, but a couple’s love life can also be negatively affected by them.  The reason is that you go from complete romantic inactivity to sudden chore-like passion, rather than a steady and heartfelt year-round celebration of your union.

A simple way to avoid the last minute dashes is to choose a random day every month where you go that extra mile for your partner.  The key is to not tell each other when that day is.  Throughout the month as you guess whether or not today is your day, you’ll notice more and more what each of you values as romance and what acts really do make you feel special.

Understand what romance means to your partner

Romance will mean vastly different things to different people and we all have some standard moves in our repertoire that we take from relationship to relationship.  These are usually a mix of what works for our own needs and what’s worked for partners in the past.  The key question we need to ask ourselves however is, what does romance mean to the person I am currently with? Romance awareness month has it correct in that we need to put the assumptions on hold and really look at what motivates and pleases our significant others.  You may be surprised at what you learn.

Have no agenda

The great thing about romance, and what always signals a true romantic, is the lack of an agenda.  When we’re being romantic for someone, there should really only be a couple of reasons why we’re doing it.   The first is simply because we want to be a good partner, we want to give what we’re capable of giving simply for the sake of giving it.  The second reason is that hopefully by default, the person on the receiving end will find happiness in our actions.

The motivation for being romantic and showing you love someone should never be because you expect something in return, for example sex. Practice the art of giving without the need for receiving and see what happens.  The outcome will be a reflection, both of who you are as people and the quality of your relationship.  Learn from it.

Let Berkeley International help find you love this romance awareness month. With offices located all over the world we are able to find you love anywhere. Fill in our discrete enquiry form today to get the matchmaking process underway.